Lest anyone would think that I'm "superwoman" (lol) in dealing with change, let me assure you I'm not! It's so strange to me how one day you can feel like conquering the world, and everything "new", then something happens that turns your heart inside out.
When my brother passed away in 2000, a friend told me to expect for my emotions to get upset at any given moment. He said, "Don't worry about it if that happens. You'll be "going through life" and it will hit you. It's okay!" I was so glad he told me that, because "it hit me" one day "out of the blue". I'm glad I knew I was normal.
Well, today I was doing just fine. The sun was shining, the flowers blooming, birds singing, my husband smiling at me, and "it hit me"! I'm LONESOME! Where did that come from? I missed my "familiar surroundings", I missed people at "home", I missed my kids and grandkids, I missed my parents, I missed my friends, I missed my sisters. Let me say, I just "missed everything and everybody"! :( It's really strange how you can be "happy and sad" at the same time. Then, on the radio I hear a quartet singing, "You've Got to Walk That Lonesome Road". LOL! Well, you didn't have to tell me THAT! The way I was feeling I ALREADY knew it!
I'm doing much better now that I've sat down and read some blogs, and answered some mail, and wrote a few cards. It's always good to "get out of oneself" and do something that's not focused on "me"! I have found there are so many "lonely" people who "have it together", yet they are wanting someone to just say, "HI". No, I'm not talking about the homeless man or woman on the street, or the cashier that checks you out at the store. I'm not even talking about your neighbor next door. I'm talking about another preacher's wife or preacher you know.
Being a preacher/preacher's wife can be very lonely. I am not talking about myself.....because I am doing fine (now), but there is someone out there who needs you to say, "I'm thinking about you"! My husband has always taught, "Many times God speaks to us in a soft whisper." I have found "His voice is like the touch of a feather brushing your mind" and you feel you need to pray for that person, or call them. You think, "I need to write a card to them." Do it! Be sensitive! Because, you have just heard from God!
A little boy went to bed one night and couldn't go to sleep. His daddy went in to check on him, and seeing he was still awake asked, "Son, why aren't you asleep?" The boy answered, "I'm scared! I want you to stay in here with me." His father told him there was no reason to be afraid, because Jesus was with him. The little boys answer has stayed with me through the years. He said, "But Daddy....I want someone with skin on!"
We all know that Jesus is with us, but there are times we just want "someone with skin on" to reach out and let us know they are near.
I feel much better now. I've talked to a friend tonight. I've received an email from a friend. I've talked to one of my sisters. I've read and enjoyed your lives by reading your blogs. I have been touched by my friends, and I just want to say, THANK YOU!
One of the greatest phrases in scripture is......"and it came to pass"! I'm glad my loneliness passed, but it didn't go away by itself. YOU helped me through it!
10 comments:
Several years ago, one of the young ministers in our church preached, "This To Shall Pass." Thank goodness trials, sickness, loneliness, doesn't last forever. Of course, a good cry always cleanses anyway. LOL Glad you are (now) doing better. I love you!
Hi, Linda--
Thanks for this post and for opening your heart. Sometimes we are afraid to do that--continue to wear the mask and say, "I'm fine," when someone asks.
It's normal to feel lonesome when we've had a major change in our lives, and as you know that doesn't mean were are rebelling against God's placement...we're just human, with human emotions.
I love you and pray God to continue to use you in His kingdom. I do enjoy your writing. It blesses me.
You are so real and I love you for it!!! You help those of us who are just a little younger :). You are truly an inspiration. Kent tries to be a mentor to young ministers one thing I've heard him say often is a minister can be sitting in a crowd at a conference and feel lonely. Isn't it good though when we can sit in that same crowd and feel connected? I woke up singing "He's been Faithful". He truly is!
Thank you for this post. It is good to know that we are not alone in our feelings. Love you.
We miss you too! Glad you are feeling better, love you!
Whew! I wish I knew the answer to that question. "How can you be sad and happy at the same time?" Anyway, I'm glad you are feeling better now. :)
Remember change is inevitable, but how we deal with change is up to us. Great post. Your writings are such an inspiration to read. I do not deal well with change myself, but I am trying to get better at it with the Lord's help.
Josh Tredway
Change often brings up past sorrows in our lives. It has happened to me many times. We know we are doing the right thing and we know we are in God's will, but we just need to draw aside and be restored.
Your posts are always so inspirational. You say what we think but don't know how to express it in words. I love you...
You are greatly missed we love ya'll bunches and bunches. The Gathers are coming to WF Oct. 18and I bet Sis. Karla would love for you to come home and visit!!! Planning a trip helps me get out of the blues and excited about an upcoming event!
Sis Elms -
Thanks for your "real" post. We appreciate you and Bro Elms being willing to suffer change and loneliness in order to help fulfill God's will for our District!
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