I'm Willing

We are a few days away from the New Year.  I start asking myself questions about the future, as I see the New Year approaching.  

This morning while listening to the Singing Rambo's, I heard a song that focused me back to "what it's all about."  

"Is there anything I can DO for you? Anything I can do?  For all the things you've done for me...Is there anything I can do? 

I'm willing to be used dear Lord, what're the price may be. So, if there's anything I can DO for you, just make it known to me. 

Is there anything I can BE for you...anything I can be? For all the things you've been to me, Is there anything I can be? 

Is there anywhere I can GO for you!  Anywhere I can go? Forsaking all to follow you, is there anywhere I can go?"

Of late, Wendell and I have had many conversations about the past, the present, and the future.  In April, he resigned his position as Texas District Secretary.  We had lived in Lufkin for eight years as he filled his time serving the brethren of Texas District.  We put our house on the market, and it sold rather quickly.  We stored our earthly belongings in the storage buildings we rented, packed our motorhome and decided to travel for however long the Lord wanted us to.  California was our destination. 

For six months we enjoyed being with family and friends in the beautiful state of California.  We enjoyed two Camp Meetings, and the cool weather along the coast.  Our hearts were filled with a lot of memories from being raised in the Western District in California.  Now, there are two districts, and we enjoyed both.  From San Diego to Eureka we preached, renewed friendships, and made new friends.  We were treated with much love and respect as we travelled the district. Memories were made and we look forward to returning someday, if the Lord wills.  

After returning to Texas, we preached a few places, then we were asked to come to Comanche, TX where Bro. Greg Hardin had pastored.  We were all saddened when the Lord took him home.  The saints at Comanche miss him very much, and after several weeks of seeking the will of God for the future, they were not ready to vote in another pastor, so they asked us to come help them through this time of healing.  

Roll back time...Thirty-six years ago we were voted in at Comanche, TX.  We had two little boys, each other, and were very tired and discouraged.  The small congregation that greeted us were loving and kind, and knew how to pray.  They were wanting revival and growth, so eventually we had new people getting the Holy Ghost and being baptized in Jesus Name.  It was an exciting time for the church and for us.  God knew we had to have something happen after suffering an onslaught of feeling like a failure.  (This is another story I will share with you someday). We stayed in Comanche for almost four years, and when we left, the church had grown and was doing great.  I was sad to leave such precious people, but God had another place He needed us.  Now, we are back for a time.  Maybe we can repay them for the love and care they gave to us when we were broken.  

Back to the present...Questions come with the dawning of 2017.

Lord...What do you have planned for our future?  What can we do to help further your Kingdom?

In discussing our future there are times I have stated MY wants.  Oh, I would love to have a quiet life and have my dream fulfilled to live in a house with a big porch.  I'd love for our kids and grandkids to come and stay, play, and enjoy time away from the hustle and bustle of life.  I'd love to have family dinners sitting around a big table, with a fire in the fireplace.  Then, take the rest of the evening sitting on the big porch watching the sunset, drinking sweet tea or Diet Coke, and enjoy each other's company.  Yes, I have MY wants, MY desires...but what does HE have planned?  

All of my life I've been taught that the will of God is the most important place to be.  I've been taught that it's not MY desires that's to be fulfilled, but HIS will.  I've been taught that I must sacrifice MY will for HIS.  Even though there are times my flesh kicks and screams as I take it to the altar of sacrifice, when I get up from my knees I'm able to say...Not my will, but Thine be done.  

I left off the last chorus of the song I shared with you above, because it says what my heart cries...

"I'm willing to be USED, dear Lord what're the price may be. So, if there's anywhere I can GO for you, just make it known to me."

As my husband reminds me from time to time, "Honey, I don't have the luxury of telling God no."  

As 2017 approaches, questions about the future arises.  I know what took place this year.  I know how much we enjoyed life.  Now, I must leave the comfort of the past, and reach to the future.  No one knows what lies ahead, but I trust Him to direct each step of the way.  Where He leads me I will follow, and I will be happy walking beside my husband as He follows the will of God.  

What Is Your Attitude?

What is your attitude?  We get so tired when kids whine and complain about EVERYTHING!  We get onto them after we figure out there's really nothing wrong, they're just in a "bad attitude."  

As an adult, some never learned to control their attitude.  Some seem to enjoy living in a childish role of a whining and complaining spirit.  I can still hear Mother's voice..."Linda Joyce...you need to get your attitude straight or I'm going to send you to your room!"  Yes, I've been told that a few times in my life!  

As an adult, I sometimes have to do an "attitude check" and straighten myself up, so I'm not "sent to my room!"  As a child, "my room" wasn't near as bad as the one I've found myself in as an adult.  "The room" of frustration, anger, bitterness, and being on edge with everybody and everything isn't near as peaceful as my childhood room.  The room of "negativity" never gets anything right.  THAT room will cause one to live a miserable life.  

Since we're talking about rooms that either help or destroy us, I've decided to go to "The Prayer Room."  I can take all my frustrations, aggravations, whining, and complaining attitude there.  When I go to the prayer room,  I find forgiveness for my rotten attitude, and peace fills my heart.  Spending time in this room will make everything better. "Create in me a clean heart, Oh God!  Renew in me a right spirit." #thinkinoutloud

Stop...Someone's Hurting!

The last few days I've had a memory come to me several times. We had just buried my mother. As we drove away from her final resting place, I felt like my heart would break. We drove a few minutes, then, I looked out the window to see cars driving by, and people passing as if nothing had happened that day. I was shocked for a second that the whole world didn't STOP and grieve with me. Then, I snapped out of my crazy thinking..."Of course, they're not going to stop their life to help me grieve for mother...they don't even know her!"  It showed me again that there are many hurting people all around me. There's no way to know who they are, or what they're hurting from, however, there IS something I can do to help them through their day.  I can slow down and be aware that someone I'm standing by, or walking by just might have a hurting heart.  I can acknowledge them...I can reach out and touch them with a kind word...I can smile...I can LOVE!  #thinkinoutloud

Memories...The Word Taught

Memories...oh how I love them!  I remember going to Grandma's house in Southern California in the summertime. I always slept with Grandma and she usually had the windows open, and a box fan running. I loved it!  On Sunday night after we got home from church, we'd go to bed and she would reach over and turn the radio on, tuning into "Hour of Power."  Pastor David F. Gray would be teaching. I hear her say, as if it were yesterday, "Oh, I love to hear that man teach!"  As a little girl I couldn't understand her love for his teaching, because I didn't understand everything he taught, but I did feel the depth of his words, and the reverence to the Word he taught. It made an impact on my heart and mind that has stayed with me my whole life. 

One of the things I miss about my husband, not pastoring a church are the many Bible studies he taught on Wednesday night.  He taught with the same depth and reverence his Pastor, Bro. David F. Gray did.  I've told him so many times, "I REALLY miss hearing you teach.  You always fed my soul."  

It's amazing the things that come to my mind.  If you've read this whole status update, then you must be a true friend.  Friends are the only ones who enjoy the ramblings of another friend. Bless you!  

#thinkinoutloud 

How Do You See Yourself?

"It constantly amazes me that men and women wander the earth marveling at the highest mountains, the deepest oceans, the whitest sands, the most exotic islands, the most intriguing birds of the air and fish of the sea – and all the time never stop to marvel at themselves and realize their infinite potential as human beings."  -The Rhythm of Life 

-Matthew Kelly 

I read this quote and my mind went to the scripture, 

“I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.”

(Psalms 139:14 KJV)

Then, my thoughts turned to the fact that so many people never see their worth, their abilities, their talents, their potential.  They seem to always focus on negative things they see in themselves.  

What if...we looked at us and saw the magnificence of who we were made to be?  After all, we were created in HIS image! 

What if...we realized the qualities He put in us?  

What if...we lived up to the potential He sees in us?  

What if...we believed this scripture and applied it to our lives?  “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” (Philippians 4:13 KJV)

Quit allowing the enemy to destroy your worth!  As the song says...

"You thought I was worth saving...So, You came in changed my life. You thought I was worth keeping...So, You cleaned me up inside.

You thought I was to die for...

So, You sacrificed your life.

So, I could be free!

So, I could be whole!

So, I could tell everyone I know!"

Stand up and see yourself as God sees you!  You're a child of the King!  You were created for a reason and your worth, your potential is far greater than you can imagine. 

I have a feeling, when those who do not know Jesus Christ have the opportunity to "view a real Christian," they see a beauty that is beyond compare to anything they have ever seen. 

Yes, the beauty of the mountains, rivers, skies, birds, fish, animals, flowers, and oceans are breathtaking to our eyes, yet God decided all of that wasn't enough, so He created you and me to be His hands, His feet, and His arms reaching to all mankind. There's nothing more beautiful than...LOVE!  ❤️  #thinkinoutloud

"Castaway"

The enemy is throwing everything he can at people who are living for God!  I heard a man say, "I realized I had become bitter and I didn't like what I felt in my heart. I had never felt that way before."  It's great when a person can RECOGNIZE this foreign feeling. When you no longer feel the change that's happened, you are being deceived.  "Create in me a clean heart...renew in me a right spirit."  A song called "Castaway" that Sis. Bobbie Shoemake, my brother Keith and I sang a long time ago still plays in my mind today. "If I carry the gospel to the regions of the lost, to a world that's going astray. Don't let me fail in sight of the gate and become just a castaway."  The chorus went on to say..."Castaway...castaway...lost forever on a cold, dark ocean. Turned away...castaway...lost, just a castaway."  (I think the words are correct, but you get the message.) I remember one service we sang it in. Bro. Shoemake preached with a soberness and deep conviction to a youth group about a clean heart. The altars were filled with kids who wanted to be saved, no matter the cost.  Do we still feel this way?  Will we give up ANYTHING that's pulling us away from Him?  Do we even RECOGNIZE what is happening in our heart that is pulling us away from Him?  Are we willing to fall at the foot of the cross so our human spirits are broken once again?  There's too much ME in me!  Like the man who was transparent about his heart...there's been  times, "I've felt something in my heart I'd never felt before, and I didn't like it!"  The words to that song will haunt me the rest of my life..."Don't let me fail in sight of the gate and become just a castaway."  #thinkinoutloud 

If you feel this post is too heavy, too negative, too convicting...I'm not sorry. It's time we, who claim to be Apostolic, fall at the foot of the cross and crucify our flesh!  I can hear our elders, through tears, admonishing  us to "PREPARE FOR HIS COMING!  HE'S COMING SOON!"

SPECIAL

I've tried to put my finger on it.  The feeling that there's so much we can do, buy, make, that it seems nothing is quite as special as it was when it wasn't so accessible.  Does that make sense?  Example:  A lady carrying an "expensive name brand" purse.  Several years ago, that "purse" was really special, because it wasn't unattainable for most of us. Now, you can buy some of these in outlets that sell them cheaper, at re-sale shops, or, you can buy a "knock-off" and make it "look like" you have the real thing. 

I don't know...sometimes I'd love to go back to...SPECIAL...where things weren't so accessible and you had to really work, save and reach for the goal.  That's when things become SPECIAL. 

Such are things in the Christian world. I love the SIMPLE, SACRED, SPECIAL things God gives to "those who DILIGENTLY seek Him. Don't give me a "knock-off salvation."  Give me a "power packed experience" with God!  Give me doctrine (truth) that will change my life!  Give me guidelines and lifestyle changes that helps me walk according to God's Word. Don't give me watered down religion. Give me the old-time experience!  That's really...SPECIAL!